What was I thinking?

I had a dream. We were together and you proposed to me. And every single time I said “Yes”. But that was my dream. I wondered what was yours.

We’ve been together for more that a year. Living together, falling asleep and waking up beside each other, facing problems side by side and capturing joyful moments together.

I want to think that we are a good couple together. That we look good and that we reflect a happy future.

I want to believe that what we have now is what you’ve always wanted, that me being around you is a nice feeling, and that your love grows whenever I’m with you or without you. Yes, I want to believe that.

I pray that you’ll come up to me one day, hold my hand, look me in to my eyes, kiss me passionately and ask me to marry you, build a family, have happy children and spend the multitude in each other’s arms. I prayed hard and cried as I kneeled.

I never wanted someone so bad like this.

But today, I thought that maybe it’s time to stop worrying and thinking about my future with you. That maybe I must stop wanting more and expecting too much. ‘Cause it’s very hard to batter up myself, drain my brain for wanting more then I’ll end up with nothing.

I only want you to know, that I love you so much it hurts. I love you so much it makes me cry. I love you so much I hated it.

1 month ago  /  0 notes